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New site? Maybe some day.
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Please remember in the future to include food drive info on all Composted flyers. If you need a reminder--
Effective immediately we are accepting/demanding donations of food and ridiculous clothing at all Composted shows. Make sure it's an already prepared food [i.e. don't bring a bag of unpopped microwave popcorn]. Spots on our guest list for people who bring really awesome stuff. This is without the approval of the rest of the band, but fuck them anyway. |
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i'm bringing raviolis and beefaroni to the next composted show i go to. the reverend and i expect the song "queefaroni" to be written and rehearsed by this time. |
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there needs to be a kiddie pool full of raviolis and beefaronis for rich to dive in and get messy in. |
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There needs to be a cyanide pill for me to swallow and end my wretched life with. |
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then who is going to dive into the chef boyardee pool? :(
(mark richards needs to be dressed as chef boyardee at said show) |
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HAHAHAHA QUEEFARONI!!!!!! |
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it's a guaranteed hit song. make a song called queefaroni, get a gold record. it's that easy. |
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My roomie also has a Composted-related idea/request--
Jared: I have a good Composted idea now for the recliner.
Jared: You need to sit on that recliner right up front in the middle of where the pit would be and guzzle beers and eat chips, and if Composted are not first on, you have to do that through the opening bands too.
Jared: And when you run out of beer you have to stop the band from playing and make one of them go get you another one.
Jared: And refer to that member as Alice or Mabel.
Rich: Or run to the package store.
Jared: hahaha
Jared: Hey Alice I'm too drunk to drive go, make me a packie run.
Rich: GET THAT FUCKIN DOG OUTTA HERE
Rich: IM TRYIN A WATCH DA NEWS |
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Hahaha, good lord. I have a small TV we can bring to set up in front of the recliner as well so you can actually watch the news...but in reality it would be the Teletubbies. |
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My recliner is amazing. The seat has sunken in so much that it resembles the Sarlacc Pit and everytime you move it even the slightest a shitload of metal rods, screws, nuts and bolts fall out of it. |
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Oh, and is completely covered in white cat hair. |
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Going senile is pretty great, you fellows should really try it sometime. |
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Pretty soon we're just going to have start bringing entire venues to shows. |
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THEY'RE CALLED FOOD DRIVES, ASSHOLE |
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Yeah, but we're going to have to bring an extra building with us. DUH. |
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I've been waiting for this moment all my life. |
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there's already a concept for the music video: rich horror laying on the floor while a girl shoots beefaronis out of her cunt all over him and mark richards, dressed as chef boyardee, beats her with a cooking spoon. the other composted guys will be doing other things. |
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ha, i started writing my post a while ago, but had to do stuff at work before i finished it. |
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Ken's post proves that me and Mark are the only members of Composted that matter. |
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Precisely. Fuck lead vocals, drums, bass and 2nd guitar. Shit's bunk. |
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Other Guy: Vocals
Rich Horror: Vocals
Guitar: Mark Fucking Richards
Guitar: Other Guy
Bass: Other Guy
Drums: Other Guy
Some Hot Chick: Beefaroni Cunt Spitter |
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no, i just haven't thought that far into the concept, so i don't have ideas for the other guys yet. maybe the four of them could dress up as broads and shoot the beefaroni out of their butcher shops at rich while mark beats them with cooking utensils. they are very important band members. |
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my idea would be really sexy |
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i'm dressing up as a broad for an upcoming music video, and we mention chef boyardee in the new song we're working on. but we can make it an epic 3 part song like violated and fryalated 1, v and f 2: the return, v and f 3: the ACOCKALYPSE. |
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As soon as I am able to, I'm dropping about $200 on a professional pedobear costume. I'm talking Disneyland vomit & heatstroke quality here. |
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Some Hot Chick: Beefaroni Cunt Spitter |
I doubt Danielle would do that!
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how bout we hire sarah michelle gellar. i hear she's got nothing going on these days. |
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Composted is not relegated to just one hot chick. Composted has thousands of hot chicks in our employ that refuse to sleep with us or anyone we know. |
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i dont get laid cuz i look like kiefer sutherland post vampire transformation in the lost boys |
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and cuz i do stuff like this |
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We don't get laid because we are members of the League of Fat & SHitty-Looking Gentlemen. |
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note, i am majorly fucking hammered right now, as per usual, but you are correct sir! haha HIIIIYOOOOO!!! naw there's gotta be a market out there somewhere for guys like us. our day shall come. |
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i dont get laid cuz i look like kiefer sutherland post vampire transformation in the lost boys |
dave, you win the thread with that post. that was one of the funniest things i've read in a long time. |
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