So I live in a Northeastern on-campus apartment-style dorm with 4 other kids. One of them has been growing a marijuana plant since he found a seed in a bag he bought. We had room checks this week and he forgot to stash it away before he left in the morning.

The RD and 4 RA's came in right after I left for class and saw it. On top of that, they found a bunch of beer tabs and caps and tops to vodka bottles and such that he kept in a drawer that he didn't shut all the way before he left. Now we're probably getting fucked. Northeastern's Police has already been alerted. They have an investigator on this case and might try to get a search warrant to search everything.

Now, I don't drink very much and I don't smoke at all. That roommate doesn't want to take the brunt of the repercussions because he claims "we all knew about it so we're all responsible for it."

If this becomes a bigger deal than 1 strike on my conduct score or whatever, this could seriously fuck up my chances at a CoOp job the semester after next. My and my roommate (the one who actually lives in my room with me) are so worried that we're listening to doom metal.

Then tell the kid that was growing it tough shit and tell them it was his. Don't be an idiot pussy faggot.

Yeah fuck that kid. He was growing it, no one else. If he has a problem, he's a piece of shit and deserves to get thrown under the bus FOR HIS OWN BULLSHIT. Fuckin' college.

I already did that. So did my other roommates. He could just tell the cops it was all of us with complete disregard to whatever we say.

yeah, fuck that kid. you dont smoke, no reason for him to take you down. i was roomies with a kid who got nailed with growing a plant, and i was fine.

I'd just say, "I had no idea." Oh well. He's a fucking pussy.

FIGHT HIM OR YOU ARE A PUSSY TOO!

Lol.

What sucks is that this kid is mostly wicked nice and very respectful except for a few OCD things. I think he's just afraid of getting in trouble because he's done some ridiculous things and never been caught.

poor lil pot plant caught in the middle :(

I'm sure his life won't be ruined by one pot plant, just as long as his record is pretty clean. And if he's done some ridiculous things and never been caught, it's about fucking time. Maybe he'll stop being a sneaky bastard and gain some integrity.

HOLY SHIT
HOLY SHIT
HOLY SHIT

Turns out that it was just one huge joke on me. They forged the shit on the paper. I'm wicked pissed right now...

Even thought that was a sweet joke.

wow you have shitty roommates. i suggest HARSH retaliation for that.

chuck norris' calendar goes from march 31st to april 2nd because NOBODY FOOLS CHUCK NORRIS

I could kill them all but that's probably worse than growing weed as far as conduct goes.

Hahahahaha, get them back by SHOOTING THEM WITH A REAL GUN.

Oh btw Marky, I showed a few of my friends Land on a Cock and they fucking love it. They quote it all the time. You're officially someone's hero.

Tell them to get me women.

Come visit with Eliot. I can get you women with penises.

I don't want women with penises. I have enough of those.

LOL

LOL no way. His plant, he gets the harvest -- and the FAIL if any happens.

HOLY SHIT PWNED

KICK HIS ASS, SEABASS

I hate college. Fuck school. Listen to metal.

You should hide a shanta in the apartment. That'll fix em. Especially now that the heat should be coming on.

I don't know what a shanta is...

but I need to get them back somehow. Give me suggestions.

you should test that little plant out and then play FFX

Lol.

FFX rules but already beat it for the third time this summer. And then I beat FFX-2. Then I beat Kingdom Hearts II. Now I'm playing Champions of Norrath very slowly while I play old Sonic games and Chrono Cross again.

No but really. I need to fuck them over.

fuck them over by taking some bud off of the plant and spreading it aroudn to a few people on this board. haha

hahaha it's it's like 8 inches tall right now. It might even be a male. Otherwise, I'd totally do that.

Rape it!

throw him under the fucking bus. seriously, fuck him. don't fuck yourslef.

Haha, way to read the thread all the way through.

lulz

I read nothing except when MFR said he wanted to fuck. then I listened. fuck him.

I vote you throw him under the bus still

I throw you under a bus made out of Mark Richards. If you know what I'm sayin.'

The anal bus?

COCKBUS.

flower cock

A shanta is when you poop in tin foil, wrap it up and stab it with a bunch of unsharpened Dixon Ticonderoga No. 2 pencils so it looks like Sputnik, then you prop it up behind the radiator.

That is a shanta.

hahahahaha

Vroom Vroom I'm a car.
I'm a squirrel and I love it.

hmmm.... while i totally think you SHOULD get them back, the reasons for me thinking this are a little different than yours probably are... Due to them fucking with you, you now have posted online about growing illegal drugs in your apartment. I would be really careful, not that i think TOO many North Eastern kids read RTTP, but there is probably a straight-edge "I'm better than you" type of guy or two who wouldn't mind seeing someone busted with a plant in their dorm. I am probably just overreacting, but you should definitely be careful from this point on.

Now, keep in mind, i realize how funny this sounds coming from me, but all of the things i admit to "cultivating" are technically legal, unless of course someone ingested them, which i would never do.

If there were kids that read RttP at NEU, I'd hope I knew them. I need more metal friends haha.

While you're partially right, they fucked with me and now I need to fuck with them.

Plus, I'm not the one growing it. My roommate is. When I asked you about that stuff it was for his sake, not mine.

Also, lol at "which i would never do."

fair enough. if you'd like help i live very close to that area, and would definitly take part.... maybe show up at your apartment with a fake badge when you call and say everyone's home, and i will knock and demand to come inside because i heard that there was a plant inside... or i could claim to be with dorm security, and say someone in your building heard about it, or whatever.. I would definitely play the part well, and could guarantee some real freaked out kids.

yeah, i feel ya man. And i hate to continue being a downer, because i will help you get revenge if you want it, but it doesn't matter in the laws eyes if it's yours or not. If it's in your residence, your are partially responsible. While it sounds like bullshit, and is probably technically not constitutional, i am fairly certain that's how the long arm of the law works.

hahahahaha oh god, that would be awesome

I may have to take you up on that. We'll see. hahaha

I'll dress up as a cop, go with Ouchie, and we'll arrest everyone and yell "YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO LAND ON A COCK!"

lol i really wish this could happen. Oh God. It would be more epic than power metal.

Let's fuckin' do it.

This will have to happen. I'll try to organize it for it to work. This will be epic.

If you can find a police uniform I'm down, haha.

awww your so stupid!!! ;)~

Oh yea. You could just come as Mark Richards and yell it anyway.

no organizing needed. Pick a night where everyone will be home, let us know, me and MFR will show up, you will act as suprised and dismayed as all your roomates. I think the most epic way for all of it to end would be for me and mark to demand blowjobs from your roomates otherwise, they're getting kicked outta school... hehe, obviously that's as far as it would go, but it would be fun to see their reactions, and how long it took them to figure it out. We should bring a camera man too, i can bullshit with the best of em, so i could explain that the camera is for evidence for the expulsion board, and is totally standard procedure.

This HAS to happen, please?

I'll hide in the dude's closet and just jerk off on him while he's sleeping.

no no, we work for the school, so we wouldnt need uniforms. we could just wear business attire.

hahahahahaha

Blowjobs for the win.

Undercover cops lul

;)~

We got an anonymous email from a student that viewed an internet discussion of illegal plants being grown in a Northeastern dorm. The discussion was led by the internet handle, "Martins," which just so happens to be the last name of one of the students in this dorm. We'll have to come in and take a look, please.

i must admit, i have no idea what the tongue-sticking-out is for..

Mention the IP address.

It's for blowj0rbs.

to make it even worse, we can say creepy things to each other as we look around, and then when we tell them we will look the other way for blowjobs, it will be all the more believable.

How about this weekend?

it's for give me the shockwave amp for 350 instead of 400!

oh, i get it.

it's not my amp. And i am not in a position to bargain. 400.

I think I'd be free Sunday.

we gotta do this.

SO? hows this weekend? I can do
fri/sat/mon/wed/thur
You think everyones gonna be home any of these days, how about you mark?

bastards ;)~

Revenge Of The Nerdfags

Maybe on Sunday. I just need to make sure that everyone is here. I'd need to sign you guys in so you might have to wait to make it seem inconspicuous.

I should put a dildo in my pocket and let it fall out when we walk in, and play it off like it's no big deal that I have a dildo in my pocket.

this has sketchy written all over it

well, i can make sunday work. How about you martins?

your a pussy. this has hilarious written all over it. We aren't gonna actually cause any trouble, and we (I) definitely won't let anyone (of martin's roomates) suck my dick. So as long as they don't freak and jump out the window or something, than it will be fine. Anyways, they deserve it, they started it.

I reeeeeeaaaally hope I'd be able to keep a straight face for this. I'm an excellent bullshit artist but I suck at not laughing unless I'm making a ridiculous face.

PREPARE FOR BATTLE

go with ridiculous then. It's better than laughing, if you laugh they will catch on too quick, and they won't have to ponder which is worse: getting kicked out of school, or having our cocks in their gullets!! BOO YA

hahaha, i'm no pussy.

i would just do the old fashioned things:

diarrhoea balloons: balloons filled with liquefied shit from laxatives rather than water. that way, when you throw them, they have shit splattered all over them.
stink bombs: good way to get them back, although stench would attract attention to dorm room
fart spray: you can buy this at any gag store. the kiosk at fanueil hall has a bunch of types of them, and they're all horrid smelling
replace shampoo with honey: works sometimes. you empty someone’s shampoo and pour loads of honey in there. when they go to wash their hair the honey ruins everyone's day.

or, you can just do what you're doing for shits and giggles. but, you weigh the options.. should you do it for SHITS (diarrhoea balloons) and giggles, or for regular "shits and giggles"

Lol while I was originally thinking small the more epic the better. I just need to make sure that everyone is here on Sunday. I know that one roommate who started it is coming back Saturday night but that one might be gone all weekend. I don't know yet.

nah, i don't think you have anything to worry about. just tell them you did't know anything the kid was up to. tell them to drug test you for mari-j (since you don't smoke) and tell them you don't drink much either. afterall they know you can't pick your roomates so how much control are you going to have over someone you hardly know? i bet eventually they'll find out it was him anyway. deny everything, say you have no idea what they are talking about.
like whoa

it was a practical joke.

tank u

IMPRACTICAL JOKE

Kick them in the box. It makes everything better.